Week of October 23, 2005

Our top kid-tech story this week is bullying and cyberbullying, told by someone who knows.

When Samantha Hahn, National American Miss Teen 2005, was in 6th grade, her best friend started a mean rumor about her, circulating it through their circle of friends. Soon it seemed the whole school had turned against her - "kids in other grades, kids I'd never met before. I didn't even know who they were and they had comments about me." Then it got physical - things (food, sharp objects) were thrown at her, she got pushed off a bus, suffered a concussion and other injuries (one leading to a hospital visit), suffered depression and recurring nightmares, had to switch schools, and more (here's the story, in her own words).

In a recent phone interview, I asked Samantha if she knew what was behind it all. "It's hard to pinpoint an exact reason - I don't think there really was one. Unfortunately, kids seem to need something to occupy their time with, and picking on someone seems to make them feel better." Now, there's food for parental thought - how to teach our children that they'll "feel better" when they support, rather than hurt, other people!

For Samantha, the bullying continued well into high school but, by 7th grade, it had already moved onto the Internet (bullying via instant-messaging and email is increasingly known as "cyberbullying").

"I would block screennames and sometimes just avoid the computer for periods of time," Samantha said, "but I needed it for homework, and I did have friends outside of school I wanted to stay connected with online. I couldn't just turn it off. But then, as a victim, why should I have to cut the computer out of my life?" she justifiably wondered at that time.

"We would save emails and chat sessions and print them out. My parents kept them in a file, because they were threats." Also, every time she received a threat, they would report it to their Internet service provider, which eventually traced them to "that same circle of friends from middle school," Samantha told me. That original group of 6th-graders had solidified into, by a law-enforcement definition, a gang of five girls who called themselves "the Evil Angels."

Now - while studying for her B.A., working part-time, and getting ready for the Miss New Jersey competition, Samantha is using her current title not only to raise awareness among adults about all forms of bullying but also to teach young people how to bully-proof themselves. She has spoken at dozens of schools and conferences throughout New Jersey and is beginning to get requests from other states. The platform, as she calls it, will certainly go with her as she competes through the levels leading to the Miss America title.

Anti-bullying resources:

• Efforts in NY, VA, NJ. The New York Times tells how bullying online and off are being dealt with on nearby Long Island, N.Y., where 83% of 6th- and 7th-graders surveyed said their schools had a bullying problem, 45% said it was significant or severe, and 30% said they had bullied someone themselves." For anti-bullying work in Virginia, see my 9/23 issue, and here's the New Jersey Coalition for Bullying Awareness and Prevention.
• For educators, "Bullying Intervention Strategies that Work" at Education-World.com - article based on the pioneering work of Norwegian psychologist Dan Olweus
• "Cybersocializing, cyberbullying," earlier coverage at NetFamilyNews, based on an interview with Nancy Willard of the Center for Safe & Responsible Internet Use
• Cyberbully.org from the Eugene, Ore.-based Center for Safe & Responsible Internet Use, recommended by the NJ Coalition above
• Canada's award-winning Bullying.org, one of the world's first Web sites on bullying, now with sister site Cyberbullying.ca, both created by educator Bill Belsey.