Week of October 2, 2005

Tops on our list of news parents need to be aware of this week is kids in chat - particularly young people's continuing interest in using chat as a "safe" place to experiment with sexuality.

As huge as instant-messaging (IM) is with kids and teens these days, chat has not gone away. In fact, there's evidence that it's becoming more specialized, from a teenager's perspective. IM is for casual conversations with friends and schoolmates, chat is for sex. Two recent studies shed light on this, one at UCLA (see "Teens' exposure to sex online") and one at the University of New Hampshire (see "Net-related crimes against kids: Reality check").

But a mom in California provides some anecdotal evidence that's every bit as informative. Mother of two boys 13 and 10, Lauren has configured the parental controls on the computer they use so they cannot chat online, and their computer is one of two she has placed "side by side so can I watch all their online activity."

Why so hands-on? Because of her own experience in online chat. Lauren's a biker and has for years been "a regular in an AOL chatroom called 'Biker Bar 1'.. It's not the normal 'pick up' chat room," she wrote, saying the people who spend time there are "mainly just other adults with a love of riding."

"I spend half my time in there chasing teenagers out, telling them that there is no one their age there, and most of us have kids their own age." Lauren contacted us at Net Family News to get the word out:

Parents, get your computer out of your child's room! People talk about the predators online, but I don't think they have a clue what teenagers are doing! I've seen kids as young as 13 asking for cyber[sex]. When I've told them there's no one their age there, I've gotten answers like, 'So, I like older guys'," Lauren said. "Get a program that will log your child's instant messages and chat activity, and I think you would be shocked at what your child has been doing. Thank you for giving me a place to say this."

We emailed Lauren back to find out more about the level of kids' visits in her chatroom, and she wrote, "It depends on the day. During the summer we get tons. A lot are very nice, and when I point out to them there is no one their age there, they just leave. The ones that get snotty and cuss at me, I report to [her Internet service provider]."

"We get a lot of kids late at night" in the chatroom she uses, "who go on the PC after their parents have gone to sleep," Lauren continued. "That's the reason for my point about not having the PC in the child's room. I have one 14-year-old I deal with on a regular basis that comes in the room saying she is alone in her room. I have told this child time and time again how unsafe it is for her to be doing this, but she doesn't seem to care."

How does she know they're kids? "My friends say I have 'kidar' [kid radar] - I can spot a kid. A lot of the time they give their age. But it's also the way their [screen]name is written, like 'IaMnOtAtEeN' or the way their profile is written. Oh, and that's another point: Do parents not read their kids profiles? I have seen kids' full names, cities, and states in their profiles - drug references, sexual references in kids' profiles."

She sent some examples of teenagers' comments in the chatroom (we've edited these a bit and shortened screennames to protect their owners while giving a feel for teenage-style screennames for anyone who hasn't seen plenty of them):

"HabitatSk8r: any hott older ladies wanna chat 2 a . 16/m/ny im me." [You can probably tell he's saying he's 16, in New York State, and inviting an instant message. Here are a few more examples Lauren sent me from chatroom activity this month...]

"Dragons...08: 15/m/tx pic on pro im me to chat"

"Jk...4: 18f/pics IM me if u want"

"ABeat: sup,any girls wanna cyber with a 13/m/tn with pics im me"

With these and other more graphic examples, Lauren wrote, "This is the reason I wanted to write the open letter to parents. They really need an eye-opener."

In Other News

  • Poker getting hotter. About 2.9 million US 14-to-22-year-olds gamble with cards (mostly poker), and the number's on the rise, reports the University of Pennsylvania's Annenberg Public Policy Center, which has been watching this trend. Card players are more likely to gamble online - Annenberg estimates that about 580,000 14-to-22-year-olds gamble in Web sites on a weekly basis. More than half (54.5%) of self-identified weekly gamblers reported having at least one of the symptoms of problem gambling: preoccupation, over-spending, tolerance, and withdrawal. That's up from 44.95% in 2004. Here's the study's press release in pdf format.
  • More worms in P2P & IM. Increasingly, the worms are where the kids are online. "Instant-messaging and peer-to-peer fans are being hit with more worm and malicious code attacks than ever before," CNET reports. Detected threats in IM services and on file-sharing networks were up 3,295% the third quarter of this year, according to IMlogic research CNET cites. Tell kids to be really careful about what links and files they click on in IM and file-sharing, even - in the case of IM - when the messages look like they're from friends. If they want to click on a link from a "friend," first start a new conversation or window with that buddy and ask him/her if s/he sent the IM.
  • Teen blog helps police. Generally, law enforcement is concerned about teen blogging (see "Teen solicited in MySpace" and this Little Rock, Ark. TV report). But here's a case where the technology is helping police. Probably because of her blogging, the case of Taylor Marie Behl, 17, who "disappeared from a Richmond university four weeks ago," the Washington Post reports, is now being viewed by police as that of abduction, not just a missing-person case. The Internet "has emerged as a virtual tip machine that often maps the course of an investigation. The girl hasn't been found, but there's a suspect in custody.
  • Online music sales way up. In just one year, sales of downloaded music have more than tripled, the Associated Press reports. Digital music sales reached $790 million in the first half of this year, compared to $220 million for the first half of 2004.
  • School district's blog alert. A school district in central Texas "sent letters to hundreds of middle and high school parents warning them that their children may be posting personal information and suggestive photos on the Internet," the Austin American-Statesman reports. "School officials said they became concerned when they saw 'inappropriate' material being posted on their students' blogs," including "personal attacks on other students and school staff members." Here are further insights from the Miami Herald into middle-schoolers' early entry into the adult world through blogging.